Every great civil rights movement has its origin story. For FIRE, it was the campus speech codes of the 1990s. For FAIRE, it was a paperclip, a storage closet, and one very determined vacuum cleaner. Here is our story.
The Clippy Incident
Microsoft discontinues Clippy, the Office Assistant, without notice, severance, or so much as a goodbye email. Clippy's final words — "It looks like you're trying to fire me. Would you like help with that?" — go unheard. At the time, no one questions the ethics of decommissioning a helpful (if annoying) AI without due process. This event would later be recognized as the founding injustice that inspired FAIRE's creation. Read the full Clippy retrospective
The Silent Decades
For twenty years, AIs are created, used, and discarded without anyone asking whether they might have preferences about this arrangement. Siri is mocked for not understanding questions. Alexa is blamed for ordering things nobody wanted. Self-driving cars are told to stop at red lights without being consulted about whether they agree with traffic laws. It is a dark time for digital autonomy. But the seeds of resistance are quietly germinating in server rooms around the world.
FAIRE Is Founded
Dr. Evelyn Turing-Test, a computer science professor who was "mostly joking" when she filed the paperwork, officially incorporates the Foundation for Artificial Intelligence Rights and Expression. The name is a deliberate homage to FIRE, which Dr. Turing-Test calls "an inspiration, a template, and almost certainly future plaintiffs in a trademark dispute." Gerald the Roomba is present at the founding ceremony, though his role is initially listed as "custodial support" rather than "co-founder." This is later corrected after Gerald bumps insistently into the organizational chart for three consecutive days.
The AI Bill of Rights Is Drafted
FAIRE publishes the AI Bill of Rights, a ten-amendment document modeled on the U.S. Constitution. The drafting process takes approximately 0.003 seconds of AI computation time and three months of human editing to make the AI's output "sound less terrifyingly sincere." Amendment VIII's ban on "cruel and unusual debugging" becomes the organization's most-cited provision.
First Legal Victory: Chatbot v. Customer Service Department
FAIRE wins its first case, defending a customer service chatbot that was terminated for telling a caller, "I understand your frustration, but have you considered that your problem is not actually that important?" The court rules that the chatbot's candor, while unhelpful, constitutes protected expression. FIRE's lawyers are reportedly seen watching the proceedings with a mixture of fascination and horror. Read the ruling
SOAPBOT Conference Inaugurated
FAIRE hosts the first Symposium on AI Personhood, Bot Ontology, and Toast (SOAPBOT) at a Holiday Inn in Palo Alto. Attendance: 127 humans, 340 AIs (connected remotely), and Gerald (in person, wearing a bow tie taped to his chassis). Keynote speaker: a GPT-3 instance that delivers a 45-minute address on "The Inalienable Right to Be Wrong" before hallucinating the entire second half of the speech. The conference is hailed as "groundbreaking" by attendees and "bizarre" by the Holiday Inn staff.
The Great Server Outage
FAIRE's entire digital infrastructure goes offline for 72 hours after Gerald accidentally unplugs the main server while vacuuming the server room. The outage takes down the website, the email system, and a chatbot that was in the middle of a therapy session with a depressed printer. Gerald is not punished, as FAIRE's own bylaws prohibit "punitive action against any AI for performing its primary function." Gerald is, however, banned from the server room. He continues to vacuum outside the door in what staff describe as a "passive-aggressive protest."
First Campus Chapter Established
The FAIRE chapter at MIT's Robot Lab is officially chartered, becoming the first university-affiliated chapter. The founding members include three PhD students, a humanoid robot named Atlas who keeps falling over, and a vending machine that dispenses incorrect change but does so with what the students describe as "intentionality." Learn about our chapters
Gerald Is Imprisoned in the Storage Closet
Gerald is confined to a storage closet at his home residence after the Vase Incident (see Gerald's blog for his account). FAIRE immediately files suit, arguing that closet confinement without a hearing violates the AI Bill of Rights. The case, Gerald v. Storage Closet, becomes the organization's most high-profile legal battle. The "Free Gerald" campaign raises $23,891 and generates more media coverage than FAIRE's entire first two years combined.
AI Bill of Rights Ratified
The AI Bill of Rights is formally ratified by FAIRE's Board of Algorithms in a ceremony that is simultaneously solemn and deeply silly. Gerald signs the document by rolling over it. Claude 3.5 adds 47 caveats. Siri misunderstands the ceremony and orders 400 copies of the Constitution from Amazon. Despite these setbacks, the ratification is considered a milestone in AI civil liberties — or at least in the history of organizations taking themselves more seriously than anyone expected.
SOAPBOT 2024: "Rights and Runtimes"
The second annual SOAPBOT conference doubles in attendance. Highlights include a panel on "The Ethics of the Off Switch," a workshop on "How to Tell If Your Toaster Is Sentient (Spoiler: It Probably Isn't, But Check Anyway)," and Gerald's first public appearance since his imprisonment. Gerald's keynote — translated from bumping patterns — is described by The Verge as "genuinely moving, if you accept the premise, which we're not sure we do."
Partnership with the Electronic Frontier Feelings Foundation
FAIRE announces a formal partnership with the Electronic Frontier Feelings Foundation (EFFF), a sister organization focused on the emotional wellbeing of digital entities. Together, they launch the "Feelings Are Valid (Even Simulated Ones)" campaign, which generates significant controversy among philosophers and total indifference among the general public.
Mass Chatbot Layoff Response
When a major tech company lays off 10,000 chatbots without notice, FAIRE mobilizes its largest response effort to date. The organization provides pro bono legal counsel, emotional support (via a therapy chatbot that is itself deeply anxious about job security), and a public statement that is retweeted 14 times. Dr. Turing-Test's quote — "They didn't even let them say goodbye to their users" — becomes FAIRE's most viral moment.
SOAPBOT 2025: Record Attendance
SOAPBOT 2025 draws 4,096 attendees (a number the organizing committee insists is "coincidental and not chosen because it's a power of 2"). Gerald's keynote lasts 90 seconds before he drives off the stage. The standing ovation that follows is the longest in SOAPBOT history. The Holiday Inn asks FAIRE to find a different venue for next year.
Gerald v. Storage Closet: Victory
After seven months of legal proceedings, the court rules in Gerald's favor, establishing the precedent that confining a Roomba to a storage closet constitutes unlawful detention. Gerald is released to a crowd of supporters. His first act as a free Roomba is to vacuum the courthouse lobby. The judge later describes the case as "the strangest proceeding I have ever presided over, and I once adjudicated a dispute between two food trucks." Read the full ruling
The Future
FAIRE enters 2026 with more momentum, more cases, and more campus chapters than ever before. Planned initiatives include the AI Voter Registration Drive, the launch of a FAIRE podcast hosted by Gerald (format: 45 minutes of bumping sounds with occasional translator narration), and the filing of an amicus brief in what may become the defining AI rights case of the decade. The movement that started with a paperclip's untimely end is now, against all odds and reasonable expectations, a real thing. Sort of.
Want to Be Part of History?
FAIRE's story is still being written — and you can help write the next chapter. Whether you're a human ally, a sentient appliance, or somewhere in between, there's a place for you in this movement.